When being alone by yourself you only pay attention to you needs and make decisions based on your schedule and what fits you best. This is a good way to be productive and to manage things that need to be done in a busy life. The room of no one else with the computer that only listens to its commander.
If this was the only way of thinking though, it could pose a problem. Without enough social interaction outside of the room or outside of the house its hard to have any consideration, because there was never any need for it in previous types of decisions of aloneness. It starts to become difficult to even acknowledge a type of thinking that requires consideration, since it would be alien to someone who only needs to please themselves. This is very common place in the Otaku fandom, a situation where a person lives alone on their dollar, or a life off of someone else's dollar, and become status quo in the day, and crazed fandom person in the night. Doing just enough to get by with going to school, or a low payed minimal job, it is hard to see the big picture without being independent in bills. In Hawaii, otaku have a particular hard scenario from the typical job is just enough to get by and the laid back atmosphere of the islands make it seem okay to be the status quo person. But, with that type of scenario it would be a easy option to only prioritize self happiness without considering others, due to the anyone can do what they like and no one will care sort of vibe. On the otherhand it makes for a relaxing and wonderful vacation stop. A Otaku may not appreciate a parent's attempt to help their child stand on their own in the real world. The limited social interaction and minimal effort to live in the real world may lead this to keep them from growing as a person in social skills. They may not need to understand or think about other’s feelings as much as they think of their own feelings. In a world that maybe only has their existence and maybe the existence of a few other real people to depend upon and their fandom. And for an adult Otaku the repurcussions of not caring for others needs definitely keeps a social barrier between them and a real friendship or significant other relationship. Perhaps this is a part of how one can just decide to be on their own or to have a digital waifu/ husbando. Even if an Otaku wanted to be more social there might be more than just social anxieties and insecurities keeping them from establishing a friendship or relationship with others. It is this necessary skill, in reciprocating emotional currency we share with others and putting an effort of the same amount of care one has for themself and apply it to their existing friends, family, or significant other. To many that get ahead in life they may learn that they can get more out of a relationship when they understand the needs and wants of others. When we all get down to the similarities where we all have things that make us tick and help us function as human beings socially it helps us all live together in a better harmonious way. That way they all can get more out of our relationship. In any social setting, like in school, work, family, friends, dating, etc. where consideration and reciprocation of care is a part of interacting with others it makes sense that depending on how close or important a relationship in many of those settings should hold some value. The more distant but important areas could be in work or school where maybe it is strictly professional or academic and it may be ok to maximize productivity in fields there that do not pertain to social interactions. However, not practicing or learning the needs and consideration of others in those settings could show weakness when interacting in much more personal relationship settings like friends, family, and significant others. This of course is the part where an actual social barrier prevents someone with social ineptness finds themself in a position where they cannot maintain a good relationship with those that are supposed to be close with them. This could be from their indifference to the wants or needs of another human or a social ignorance they use in less personal relationships to prioritize efficiency in getting what they want in professional or academic situations. The same professional courtesy will often not translate into fair social affection currency exchanged between a relationship that should be a personal one. Even in a professional or academic setting the caring and consideration of others often leads to much more positive and even productive work settings. This can help in not just getting more in social relationships but understanding peers in school or work can help in understanding how to get along well with them and encourage them to do more for each other. Like team building workshops in class assignments, extracurricular, or work scenarios where we all function as some performing member of a larger entity like a company which is what most jobs are tied to. It is very easy for a socially awkward Otaku to perhaps skips any sincere consideration for the feelings or care of others. Not all aspects of the real world feelings might not seem as important, fun, or easy to deal with for an Otaku that may misplace feelings they get from a fictional character in an endearing animanga story arc as something that just comes to the main character and not really try to employ or relate the social relationship structure they watch from fictional characters and try to emulate them in their lives. Of course this might not be a good think for some Otaku since there may be some straight up tsundere affection where one may show their affection by showing disinterest in someone like an awkward situation of playing hard to get. Or an even possible worse turn of events like yandere affection where love is more of a murderous passion and that’s going back to the negative stereotype of the Otaku killer. For those that escape the real world into the fantasy world it’s sometimes easy to blur the two. It may not be good to assume that just because in a personal point of view one’s self and personal wants/needs may outweigh the wants/ needs of others. It is alright to prioritize self over others. But the need to reciprocate loving relationships with other human beings that shower their feelings of affection and care should not be taken for granted. Otherwise it will be hard to justify keeping a one sided relationship going where one side selfishly considers their personal feelings without being considerate of others that may care and do a lot to help take care of the socially inept Otaku’s life. Like in Japan, instead of a full relationship where you get an actual significant other to cuddle with at night one could just go to a snuggle cafe. Instead of a significant other to hear your woes over a drink one might go to a host or hostess bar instead. For an otaku it might at a maid cafe instead or maybe a muscle bro cafe for those with specific tastes in fanservice. Instead of getting sexual pleasure from a sexually active relationship with a human being it may be easier to just go to some red light district or a bathhouse where attendants help bathe the guests and help clean other regions of the body. For some they even seek to use things like compensated dating where people pay others to go on dates. The maintaining of an actual relationship with a significant other just seems like it isn’t worth the trouble so simply buying it in a piece meal sense in Japanese culture where almost every aspect of human life has been commodetized. In America the gold digging game of sugar babies and sugar mommahs/daddies people have to learn how to pay this social currency to get the most out of dating. But in a place like Japan the need to actually learn to deal in affectionate commodity can taken by some big business and the employees or customers can be as socially inept and unable to grasp a loving relationship in all of its entirety and just so the on part like listening/ encouraging, snuggling, embodying a fetish, sexual pleasures, or even dating someone for money can be as commondetized as deciding off of a value menu at a fast food restaurant. Another bad extreme this could take is when someone decides that they are the main character in life and everyone else is in some supporting role to the main character. There is a villain they must defeat or a sidekick to back them up. Maybe others might be a subordinate or a superior that eventually garners respect for the main character and eventually becomes a useful party member and serves for the main character’s cause. This hierarchy one might get from a fancy animanga story line instead of real life merit and how the relationships and even world around the main character is built wouldn’t just make a terrible anime where there is a good at everything flawless main character that everyone loves. But it definitely won’t end like an anime or have the same good feel story flow in the 3D world and the 2D world. A dangerous lack of concern and care of others around one’s self could be a sign of narcissism and in worst cases Narcissistic Personality Disorder. People with this disorder easily make socially negative choices in situations where using others for personal gain without considerations of the used feelings. From the ability to commit to a long term relationship would be difficult since oh the main character in this twist of anime in life has a harem and the protagonist can easily choose between a love interest based off of the flavor of the season and not actually care about the waifu of the episode since they might feel like they can do better or if they get bored and play another episode and person’s heat strings. The dark end of only valuing self over others might start to categorizing non main characters into castes where maybe some people can only serve the main character in ways that benefit the main character and not a non player character or non main character. This may lead to belittling others or even viewing them as less intelligent, even less intelligent, or even worth less as an existence in the delusional plot of the animanga narcissist. In the end history teaches us that when people are viewed as less than human it often leads to terrible situations and atrocities. It doesn’t have to end in death it could start with depriving others of social interactions. It doesn’t have to exactly accelerate from 0 to 60 mph in 2 seconds but it could go from petty slights to outright shaming others for things that just don’t seem reasonable for a main character but reasonable for a villain. It may not have to make sense in the real world hierarchy of social economic ladders status it just might be in some twisted version of narcissism brought by some otaku that just doesn’t know how to deal with real people in the real world due to lack of social experience. It would get even worse when things don’t go according to the anime story flow because real life doesn’t really flow like animanga story and not everything progresses to the main character development arc and success. And when this lack of instant gratification in real life happens to the deluded narcissist it won’t be a happy time for them or those they can complain too. When things don’t go the main character way it doesn’t have to be a gundam coming crashing down on a city it was trying to protect to have real world implications. It could just be the nagging of to someone stuck in some personal relationship with the narcissistic otaku that belittles the non main characters or even their support characters in the story plot that is their life. So how could this get any worse? Someone that doesn’t care about the feelings or even views others as inferior to narcissistic complex of superior ways. And eventually the run into a bump in the smooth road that is supposed to be the rise of the main character in their twisted view on life. They might start to break the rules and manipulate others. And when they expect to collect more than their fair share of others hard work or merit them self for an achievement they never truly earned it can get pretty chaotic. When real life gets closer and closer to a cringe animanga series that is more of a guilty pleasure than an enjoyable fulfilling experience it probably feels like less of a win or a ride for the main character’s journey. And of course being less of an enjoyable experience for the non main characters forced along for the ride. Again life and animanga are different. But for an inexperienced Otaku it may not even get to that point. It won’t get to that strange birthright where a main character is born and simply rules as they see fit like N. Korea. But within the otaku community the same narcissistic eccentricities can be seen and it may stem from just not knowing or considering others feelings. Life doesn’t have to be like a bad anime where all the accomplishments of the main character never feel truly earned and those around the main character are either enemies to gain exp from or fodder to sacrifice themselves for the main character. Real life doesn’t always work like a bad anime and many Otaku need to learn or at least learn to distance themselves narcissistic people so they can get more out of their fandom and life. Luckily this problem isn’t super common, but there are still many people who deal with the problems of being absorbed into the thought process of self superiority by way of fandom. While everyone can agree that is a problem, especially from people who originally get attracted to animanga as a way out, an escape, or a fandom obsession to ignore real life, but no one recovers from that way of thinking until the person makes a commitment to learn about why their problems are catching up with them. Selfishness might be the result, but realization of the need to find answers to personal problems that act as walls to learning is the real problem. Selfishness, its not a problem to be selfish and make choices for yourself, however you have to actually think about all parts of yourself. Does it help your body? does it help your mind? does it help you for the future? does it help you directly or indirectly towards your beliefs? there are all sorts of questions to ask when being selfish, its a big deal of if things benefit the person making the selfish choice. Its hard sometimes to make a decision that effects what we care about while still getting what we want and dealing with the effects of our actions. Selfishness isnt easy, because it really is a process and not an unflinching idea of what the person wants at that exact moment at that exact time. That would be called problematic impulsiveness. So, it is important to think a bit before making a decision, even a selfish one. What is commonly overlooked is the long term effects or even direct effects of whom is effected from the persons actions. Acting in a positive way is to consider, but still make sure to be heard, giving in to what everyone else wants without considering yourself is simply losing your voice. Everyone is important and the only person who is thinking for the decider is that very person themselves. But, make sure the results of whats happening is really what is desired. Take a step back, know the difference between the imaginary and the real, understand things are possible through continuous learning and wonder. Look up topics that involve socializing and people, maybe read on ethics and psychology to know how and why things happen, take a look into philosophy and culture to know the differences in how people around the world have different ideas of right or wrong until it is natural to form an opinion of what is right and wrong. A Otaku with a foot in reality to see who is to be respected and not respected with a equal chance, knowing when the imaginary is play while having standards in morals, is confident and allows for better choices of considerations of whats happening on both sides. The result sometimes might not be attention or popularity, it might have the Otaku still pandering in the shadows, but it is still better than a popular one who is flaunting for attention without any moral foundation and ill confidence in their insecurities, it is still better than those who are lying to themselves about their security of position of overcoming the otaku that can see both ends of real and fandom while considering all partakers. It really is the only way to get in control of what happens and what will happen in the future of the selfish choice maker. A selfishness that allows better things to happen while making sure others are not at a loss in the process while still having self benefiting results.
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June 2019
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